Great Video Demonstrating How To Get Your Ex-Back
Text Size : [+] | [-]Why Keeping Your Cool Will Get Back Your Ex-Girlfriend
Text Size : [+] | [-]Losing someone you love can be devastating, and feeling alone in it all can make the days and nights seem endless. Breaking up is hard to do- especially if youre not the one who wanted the split. Regardless, there are ways to deal with the pain while making a plan to get her back.
Where to Start?
Youve got to start with you. Stop everything for a bit and focus on you. Are you eating enough? Getting enough sleep and exercise? Youll be no good to anyone if you dont care for yourself. Keep up with a good work out program, stay shaved and well-groomed.
Resist the urge to overdo the alcohol. You need to stay clear right now, and alcohol only dulls the pain temporarily. You are going to go through some intense sadness and some loneliness, but you will get through to the other side.
Resist the Urge to Call
Resist the urge to contact your girlfriend. Dont invent reasons to call or visit her. Absolutely do not cruise her work or her mothers house or the club she frequents. That will not score you points and could be construed as stalking! Stay cool for a while. It wont be time to call until you are feeling less vulnerable.
If you see her, tell her you are fine and that you hope you can still be friends. Your unexpected casualness may cause her to let down her guard and begin thinking about things.
Ouch! Admit You Could Have Done Better
Even if you werent directly the cause of the break up, find a way to let her know you could have done better. Spend some time thinking about the way you were with her. Women need to feel valued. They want to be told they are beautiful and intelligent. They want your admiration and respect. Your girlfriend wants you to see her as the sexiest woman alive- at least in your eyes. She needs to hear it often. Daily.
Did you listen to her? Were compliments, hugs and gentle touch daily habits? Let her know you goofed up. If you cheated on her or gave her a reason to distrust you, tell her youre sorry. But dont beg. Just let her know youve been thinking.
Extend Yourself Thoughtfully
This is tricky, but it can work. If you need to drop some of her things off, include a small gift that shows you remember who she is, and why you liked her to begin with. A CD of her favorite group, a book by a favorite author, or- and this is very effective- a beautifully bound blank journal. Your girlfriend will be taken a back by your thoughtfulness. Her response may surprise you. But it may take more than one time. Just dont overdo it.
Remember her birthday. If she has children, remember their birthdays. Try to be sincere but somewhat detached. And always appear confident and in control when you see her. Your strength will be a powerful magnet!
Bide Your Time- Then Make Your Move
Chances are your girlfriend is going to be missing you, despite evidence to the contrary. Even if shes begun a new relationship, you were in her heart first and you can win her back. Remembering these important hints can help you regain her affection and eventually put you in a position to be more direct with your desire to have her back.
Really search your soul- What could you have done when you were with her to keep her tuned in and turned on to you. Write it down and list some practical ways you could improve. Dont throw this list away!
Keep your attitude good- Get counseling if you feel youre going under with the pain of your separation. Stay physically and mentally active. Attend to your spiritual self by meditating or listening to self-development tapes.
Let her know youre still there for her- Caution: Fine line here! You need to present as caring but not crazy. Simple thoughtful gestures can keep you connected to her without generating her resistance.
Tell her how you feel- When youre in a stronger place, let her know how you feel. Tell her you were at fault, without rehashing the breakup. Really listen to her thoughts and feelings. Let her know you still desire her and want her back.
Then back off- Tell her youll wait, and that you dont need an answer now. And mean it. If shes worth waiting for, then wait.
Dont wait forever- Decide in your heart what a reasonable time to wait is- but dont tell her. She does not need an ultimatum. It might be reasonable to wait a few weeks, or a few months. Youll know in your heart and mind how long is long enough. Chances are, shell be phoning you or knocking on your door within days or weeks if youve continued the occasional thoughtful and upbeat contact. And if she doesnt, youll be strong enough to take it and move on.
Remembering that life is an adventure and often unpredictable will help you weather this downturn. Your sadness, anger and loneliness is natural and it is real. But you can go through this- and come out better and stronger on the other side.
Source: http://www.author-article-directory.com/2009/03/12/why-keeping-your-cool-will-get-back-your-ex-girlfriend/
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How to Have a Great Marriage
Text Size : [+] | [-]How to Have a Great Marriage
from wikiHow - The How to Manual That You Can EditThe wedding is over and so is the excitement of planning the wedding. Soon you will be settling in to married life. Having the perfect marriage is a mix of compromise and honesty, not subservient behavior.
Steps
- Be yourself from the start of any relationship. If you begin the relationship by putting on the front of a perfect hybrid version of you and some sort of Stepford wife, what happens when the cracks begin to show? Be yourself from day one, and your spouse will have proven that you are accepted and loved for who you really are, not who you are pretending to be.
- Exercise your sense of humor. A good, stout sense of humor is indispensable for a great marriage. Try to see the humor in difficult situations, it'll help you both roll with tough times much better.
- Forgive, forgive, forgive. The three most important words for a good marriage.
- Give each other the benefit of any doubts. You have built a relationship based on trust. Don't assume that your spouse is doing things for the purpose of irritating you - maybe s/he just doesn't realize something s/he does is bothering you. Let your spouse know about things that bother you without assuming the worst of him or her, and once it's out in the open give your mate time to make adjustments and corrections.
- Try to let the little annoyances go. Ask yourself if something irritating you is really worth fighting over. Is something wrong, or is it just different from the way you would do it? Allow differences to go by without comment. If something is really bothering you, talk about it in a non-accusatory way, and see if you can work it out without arguing.
- Find ways to share responsibility. If you're both working 80 hours a week, why should the wife still have to do all the cooking and cleaning? Try to find a mix of jobs you both do better, e.g. dishes and lawn mowing, and share responsibility. Find ways of creating a routine that involves everyone, i.e.: “If you take the bins out, I’ll bring them in", “You wash, I’ll dry", etc. This will avoid the nagging housewife syndrome. Remember, you will be living together forever( til death do you part) - save some for tomorrow. The world won't come to an end if you don't finish all the laundry today.
- Make time to sit down together once a day and share time together. Even if it's only 10 minutes before bed, talk, cuddle, and share each other’s company.
- Don’t expect perfection. Remember, your spouse is human, and so are you. Make allowances for the human condition: tired, overworked, over-stressed, family illnesses, personal illnesses, and simple frailty.
- Do something nice for your partner during a rough patch. Cold shouldering or constant arguing about a contentious issue will likely just drive you apart. A thoughtful gesture can go a long way in helping you feel closer to each other, making it that much more likely that you will work through your problems. This works especially well if you feel like your partner does not compliment or do nice things for you often any more. Start complimenting them and make it a point to be nice -- they'll WANT to do something nice for you!
- Try to find something nice about your partner every day, and say it to them! Whether it's a compliment on his/her outfit or a thank you for just taking out the trash, it always feels good to get a little boost from the person you love. And you'll feel good doing the boosting.
- Learn from your mistakes. When you say "I'm Sorry", mean it! That means you won't repeat the action. Apologizing and then repeating the behavior shows your mate that you weren't that sorry after all, and it erodes trust over time.
- Keep no secrets, and avoid even the appearance of any hanky panky. Being transparent with your partner is important, because it shows you each trust one another with every detail of your lives. If you're harboring secrets, they will eventually be found out and that will spell trouble for your marriage. Keeping things clear and open prevents suspicion and jealousy. Don't do things to get a rise out of your spouse, and if someone at the office is hitting on you and won't stop, tell your boss about it and ask that one of you be transferred. If you maintain a clean appearance and an honest, open communication with your partner, you will be trusted when it's truly imperative.
- Remember that marriage is a nuts and bolts arrangement. While you're planning your wedding, you may entertain fairy-tale notions of a life lived happily ever after. The reality of marriage is that sometimes, it's just a day to day grind - one or both of you may be tense, on edge, bored, not happy with the other one, not feel so warm and fuzzy. It's not all about your feelings. Repeat: it is not all about your feelings. It's about your committment to one another. Whether or not you "feel" like you're in love, "feel" you're getting your needs met, or whatever, the reality is, you have sworn a vow to one another. A lot of the time, marriage isn't romantic at all - it's about teamwork and getting the job done every single day.
- Plan for down times. You will have much less stress to deal with if you work together to plan a budget, accumulate at least a small savings account ($500 emergency fund can work wonders), and prepare for the times when things go wrong, life will be much smoother.
- Act like everything's okay. If you're having a rough patch, feeling like you just can't remember what attracted you to him in the first place, wondering what possessed you to marry her... just smile and behave yourself in a kind, genteel way. Act like everything is normal. In fact, go out of your way to be kind, thoughtful, and caring toward your mate. It may sound weird, but if you just keep putting one foot in front of the other, and act like nothing's wrong, eventually, everything really will be normal, okay, and even better.
- Don't be afraid to go to bed angry. A lot of well-meaning people say that you shouldn't let the sun set on a fight. But it's far better to simply come to a point in the argument where you can stop fighting actively and sleep on it. Instead of continuing an argument that is escalating out of control and going in circles, stopping, resting, and waking refreshed can give you new perspective, and help you come to a better and more satisfying resolution than just fighting it out until you're both battered, bloody, and after you've said things you can never take back. Sleeping on it will also help you allow residual negative feelings to dissipate - you don't always just say, "Okay, that's it, argument over," and return to those warm, loving feelings - sometimes resentment lingers awhile. Let it go - get some rest. You'll both feel better in the morning.
- Ask yourself what you can do today to make your spouse's life happier. By finding one way each day to make your partner's life just a little bit nicer, you will never forget that you truly do care for him or her. Doing nice things for your mate makes you think nice thoughts about him or her. It's a good habit.
- Kiss your spouse for at least 5 seconds before you leave in the morning and before going to bed at night.
- Say thank you for the little things (doing the dishes, clearing the table, putting a new roll of toilet paper out, and do these things WITHOUT expectations).
- Compliment each other every day. It doesn't take much to make your spouse feel good. Be sincere and when you're given a compliment, even if you don't agree, just say "thank you."
- Hug and hold hands often, daily.
- Shut up and listen! You do much more learning with your mouth closed and your mind open. You have one mouth and two ears so you can listen twice as much as you talk.
- Argue softly. How you say things can have a larger impact that what you say. Remain calm and speak in a normal tone of voice.
- Be cautious and think before you choose the words you use. Before you speak ask yourself this: if you or your spouse died that moment, would you want what you are about to say to be the last words you shared?
- At least once a month, have a special evening out with another married couple so you can laugh and learn from each other's relationship. Have at least one romantic night out per month and bring the romance home with you!
- Take a class together. There are some restaurants that will teach you how to make a meal from start to finish or you can both learn to play a musical instrument. It's a great way to spend time together and see how each other learns.
- Take turns making decisions. It's no fun when someone asks you for your opinion and you say, "whatever you want." If all they wanted was what they wanted, they wouldn't have asked you. Be polite and give a complete and honest answer.
- Exercise together. Being healthy and taking care of yourself shows your partner that you want to be around for a long time and will be able to care for them if they get ill.
- Appreciate your partner's strengths as well as their weaknesses. They chose to be with you because there are aspects of your personality that they can learn from and absorb. Show them how much you love them by being supportive when they are weak and proud when they are strong. Listen to what they say, you may learn something.
- Do the little things (see number 2). Waking up to a hot cup of coffee or an ironed shirt, or coming home to lit candles are little ways to show that you care.
- Show appreciation and don't ever take him/her for granted or you will miss him/her when they're gone!
- Laugh at the little mistakes in life, hold the drama for major crisis! Don't make an issue of the "toothpaste tube", laugh at the small nuisances and you will be a happier person for it!
- Accept responsibility for your actions and choices. Be honest in all aspects of your relationship. If you have not been, start now!
Tips
- Try a "Sunday night roundup". Go to bed earlier on a Sunday, and sit up and talk about the weekend, and what you both have coming up next week. It’s a great way to really catch up.
- Also try making Monday evenings a standard to spend time together as a family. Round up the kids and share an uplifting message, and end with some treats.
- Go on a date once a week! Take your wife on a date every Friday or Saturday. This gives you time away from the kids, and some quality one on one time together.
- Read "The Good Marriage Guide" by a chap John Farrelly in Ireland, it is excellent!
Warnings
- Make sure you have a really clear, open plan involving the finances. Many people have difficulty in their marriage due to money issues.
- Avoid being overly critical or defensive. If you are arguing and your spouse makes a gesture to end the argument through humor or apology, try to take it. You can always talk through the issue when you are calmer.
Related wikiHows
- How to Be a Good Wife
- How to Learn to Accept a Gay Marriage
- How to Avoid the Marriage Rut After Kids
- How to Get Married in Hawaii for Cheap
- How to Overcome the Fear of Marriage
- How to Learn to Accept Marriage
- How to Choose a Wedding Chapel in Gatlinburg, Tennessee
Article provided by wikiHow, a wiki how-to manual. Please edit this article and find author credits at the original wikiHow article on How to Have a Great Marriage. All content on wikiHow can be shared under a Creative Commons license.
How to Save a Marriage
Text Size : [+] | [-]How to Save a Marriage
from wikiHow - The How to Manual That You Can EditLearn how to save a marriage and avoid divorce even if you're the only one trying. Yes there are proven ways to save a marriage and stop a divorce and they are available to everyone.
Steps
- Open communication. In the process of the relationship certain things went unsaid and walls were built on both sides, which eliminate the opportunity for clear communication.
- Create a safe space for this communication. This means actually addressing with your spouse that you are open an in fact wanting them to fully communicate with you and anything they have to say is fine and there will not be repercussions after this discussion.
- Honor what you have said. The first time you have this open communication with your spouse they are probably going to test you. They may not even knowingly be doing this, but they will see it is really safe to communicate with you and if you hold it against them afterwards. Honor what you have said and you will win back the trust that is essential for open communication.
- Lead first. You have to be the one to lead the relationship into this new ground and new ways of communicating. That means you have will need to lead by example and create the space and the trust for your spouse to feel ok with being honest with you.
- Continue to have these open conversations and dig deep to the core with them. Don't talk about how you get angry when your spouse forgets your birthday. Really get to the core issue for example you feel like "you were never good enough for them." That level of honest can move mountains in your relationship and your life and it will give your spouse the ability to be truly honest with you.
Related wikiHows
- How to Get Your Ex Back Easy Techniques
- How to Save a Troubled Relationship
- How to Win Your Man Back
Article provided by wikiHow, a wiki how-to manual. Please edit this article and find author credits at the original wikiHow article on How to Save a Marriage. All content on wikiHow can be shared under a Creative Commons license.
How to Survive a Divorce
Text Size : [+] | [-]How to Survive a Divorce
from wikiHow - The How to Manual That You Can EditDivorce can be difficult - but there are things you can do to make it less difficult that will give you the best chance to achieve the best possible solutions. Anger, hurt, sadness , confusion, frustration and resentment are very real, reasonable emotions during the divorce process. Staying stuck (or being dragged unwillingly back by the various unending circumstances of the day) in these emotions can completely weaken your reasoning and decision-making abilities. They can also rob you of your future happiness. Humor and laughter can increase your chances of divorce success.
Steps
- Take care of yourself. You may have heard it before and not really followed through, thinking that this would involved a large time or money commitment (e.g. new exercise program, new diet, extra sleep, etc). But taking care of yourself can be simple -- for instance, just laughing more will make you feel better Laughter will improve your mental, emotional, and physiological well-being.
- Use your newfound well-being to have a wonderful evening with your children, or to keep your sanity and your peace while your spouse tries to rattle you, or to make a better divorce agreement decision, or to save an expensive call to your divorce lawyer just to vent. One thing is for sure - nothing bad will come of it.
- Look for new activities to pursue. Are there hobbies that you enjoy or new activities that you would like to explore? It is a good time to get involved in something that distracts your mind from the difficult time you have been going through and gives you a sense of fulfillment and enjoyment. Another idea is to consider volunteering - helping others in need is often a good way to distract you from your own pain.
Tips
- Go at your own pace. If your divorce is already Hell, and you can only handle one chuckle per week, start there. If your divorce process hasn't begun yet, but your marriage has been Hell for a while, then maybe you might try 5 minutes of comedy a night.
Warnings
- Your future-ex-spouse might get very upset by your light-heartedness. It will show them that you are moving on. The best way to attract great things into your life is to be in a good emotional space.
Related wikiHows
- How to Overcome Sadness
- How to Choose the Right Divorce Lawyer
- How to Overcome the Fear of Marriage
- How to Live a Happy Married Life
- How to Deal With a Spouse's Previous Marriage
Sources and Citations
- http://www.rightdivorcefoyou.com
- http://www.nridivorce.com
- http://www.heritage.org/Research/Family/BG1373.cfm
Article provided by wikiHow, a wiki how-to manual. Please edit this article and find author credits at the original wikiHow article on How to Survive a Divorce. All content on wikiHow can be shared under a Creative Commons license.
How to Avoid Getting a Divorce
Text Size : [+] | [-]How to Avoid Getting a Divorce
from wikiHow - The How to Manual That You Can EditYour marriage looks like its over and your spouse has told you s/he wants a divorce. Perhaps s/he's even moved out. Maybe s/he's even having an affair. How do you stop fighting? How do you get him/her to change his/her mind and stay?
Steps
- Act Happy. Your spouse fell in love with a happy person whose world lit up every time s/he walked into the room. It's understandable you're unhappy that s/he's pulling away from you, but the more you cling, need, and desperately try to hang on, the more unhappy you are (since it's obvious by now that s/he's leaving you), and the less and less you are the person s/he once fell in love with. Be honest with yourself: Would you want to spend the rest of your life with someone who's been acting the way you have been acting lately? If you're happy, carefree, lighthearted, freindly, and fun to be around, s/he will want to be around you. S/he will start to gravitate (slowly but surely) back to you. But since right now you're not verry happy at all, Act Happy.
- Agree to everything your partner says. Does you partner want to empty the bank account and buy a sports car? Say "I agree, it would be great fun to buy a flash car. Let's go to the auto show this weekend, pretend we're filthy rich, and go for some test drives." Notice how you bypassed (for the time being) emptying the bank account and instead focused on his(her) feelings. Does your partner say you don't do enough chores around the house? Say "Yes, I agree, I don't do any where near as much work around the house as you do. I understand how upset that must make you feel at times." Notice how you bypassed (for the time being) actually doing the chores, and instead focused on her(his) feelings.
- Please write the rest of this article! We need advanced agreement techniques for when your partner wants to spend beyond your means or empty the bank account on a sports car! We need advanced agreement techniques for when your spouse "backs you in a corner". We need most of all how to address the bypassed issue when it rears it's ugly head!
Tips
- Agree to everything your partner says. If your spouse calls you a lazy good for nothing bum, say "Yes, I'm no Donald Trump (Condolezza Rice), that's for sure!"
- Shut up. A lot.
- Listen. A lot.
- Do not defend any of your actions.
- And our final tip is the same as the first step: Act Happy. Because remember, if after doing all the steps and tips listed here, the marrage still ends in divorce, the best revenge is living well.
Warnings
- You should not try to fix a broken relationship if you spouse is or has physically harmed you, your children, or your family or given any sign of physical aggression. Instead, you should seek immediate protection from physical harm. Contact your local shelter, police, family, or freinds and tell them you need help.
Related wikiHows
- How to Be Happy After Divorce
- How to Hire a Divorce Lawyer
- How to Deal With Children in a Divorce Situation
- How to Handle Divorce Anger
Article provided by wikiHow, a wiki how-to manual. Please edit this article and find author credits at the original wikiHow article on How to Avoid Getting a Divorce. All content on wikiHow can be shared under a Creative Commons license.
How to Flirt for Teens
Text Size : [+] | [-]How to Flirt for Teens
from wikiHow - The How to Manual That You Can EditTeenage years. Hormones are raging and of course, first loves can be potentially found. But maybe you're too shy to initiate a relationship? Read up on a few tips and you'll be a flirting expert!
Steps
- Find your target. Obviously, you need someone to flirt with before you can follow these steps, so go out, search Facebook/Myspace/Bebo etc or however you find love and then return once you've found the person you want to flirt with. If you've already done this then continue reading.
- "Break the Ice". So you've found that person you want to flirt with. Now, how to break that metaphorical ice. This isn't hard once you're confident and determined to flirt successfully with this person. Introduce yourself and try cracking a joke, or even making light contact with the person e.g poking playfully or wiping an imaginary eyelash off their cheek. First impressions count! Most importantly, make sure you smile and of course be yourself. Now you've broken the ice, it's time to make them realize they want you!
- Advance. Once you've made a good impression it's time to follow it up with your charm. Go out and get to know the person. Bat your eyelashes subtly at him if you're a girl and if you're a guy push your shoulders back and show the girl you're trying to impress her by making yourself look big, strong and like you can protect her. If you're flirting really successfully here, you may even be ready for that first kiss - but don't worry. This can take time and of course will require patience. Just keep at it!
- The First Date . So if your flirting has worked so far, you may end up on a date with someone. Congratulations! Just be yourself and continue using those techniques and ideas above to keep showing your date why they like you!
- The First Kiss . This can be daunting and a little awkward at first, but once you get into it you'll find it fun and romantic. For a first kiss, just peck lightly on the lips and only go in for more if you're both ready for it. Now you've successfully dated and kissed your ideal person, you're all set! Keep at it!
- The First Date . So if your flirting has worked so far, you may end up on a date with someone. Congratulations! Just be yourself and continue using those techniques and ideas above to keep showing your date why they like you!
Related wikiHows
- How to Hint for a Kiss from a Guy
- How to Get Gorgeous Kissable Lips
- How to Flirt Physically
- How to Achieve Flirty, Defined Eyes
- How to Look Your Best for a Guy or Flirt
Article provided by wikiHow, a wiki how-to manual. Please edit this article and find author credits at the original wikiHow article on How to Flirt for Teens. All content on wikiHow can be shared under a Creative Commons license.
How to Flirt With a Pretty Girl
Text Size : [+] | [-]How to Flirt With a Pretty Girl
from wikiHow - The How to Manual That You Can EditAre you attracted to a girl you think is out of your league? Read this article for some tips on how to gain her interest and improve the likelihood of successful interaction. If not... be single.
Steps
- Be yourself. Do not attempt extreme images such as macho, super-smooth, cool dude, comedian, pick-up artist, witty conversationalist, or having a profession that you do not have. Even if it does impress her momentarily, the truth will surface eventually, and you will likely lose her trust and her interest. It is much better to be honest from the beginning.
- Start a conversation with her. Most girls want guys to make the first move, so speak with confidence and flow, demonstrating that you are secure with yourself. You can pretend the confidence at first, and it will come more naturally when she responds to you.
- Listen more than you talk. This doesn't mean sit there like a dud, but ask a question, wait until she is completely done talking, then make a comment that shows you were listening. Also, don't interrupt her. Girls hate that. This will kill your chances really fast. Also, except if the matter is very important, don't argue a lot.
- Be bold but also courteous. If you can't think of anything else to say, look her in the eyes and compliment her. Don't be afraid to speak up, or you will never get anywhere!
- If she has a scarf on that you think is nice, tell her, and touch her scarf for a few seconds, and ask when and where she got it. Use an undertone—girls love it when you lean towards them and murmur a compliment.
- Don't overwhelm her with compliments. You should focus on going from "nice acquaintance" to "intimate friend/potential lover" smoothly. Intimate friends joke around, tease each other gently, touch each other. Start with touching her on the arm when you're laughing (don't watch the hand). See if she touches you.
- If she has a scarf on that you think is nice, tell her, and touch her scarf for a few seconds, and ask when and where she got it. Use an undertone—girls love it when you lean towards them and murmur a compliment.
- Find out her interests, and music she likes. Then talk to her about them. If you can't think of anything to talk about, use a conversation starter like "How has your day been?" or "Don't you love this time of year?". These most usually only work if you are already friends with her, and you see her on a daily basis. If you do see her on a daily basis and she mentions, for example, a vacation she is going on soon, inquire where she is going, and branch off from there; when she gets back ask her how it was. Don't be extremely serious in your inquiry, just ask it casually.
- Be funny. Most girls agree that a good sense of humor is attractive. Humor can also relieve awkwardness. If you say something weird, follow it up with something funny and turn it into a joke. Alternatively, just learn to be witty. Almost all girls like intelligence as well as confidence, and blending those with humor can be a very effective combination.
- Teasing a girl can be a good way to make her laugh and keep things interesting. Just don't joke about something that may be a sensitive issue, such as her weight. If she strongly cares about saving the trees, for example, and you rip up paper in an attempt to get laughs, she'll just end up hating your guts.
- Find something that you both think is hilarious. Turn it into an inside joke, so when you want to talk to her, you have something to say no matter what, and she thinks that something is funny. However, don't use it too much, otherwise it loses its humor and her opinion of your humor is lowered.
- Teasing a girl can be a good way to make her laugh and keep things interesting. Just don't joke about something that may be a sensitive issue, such as her weight. If she strongly cares about saving the trees, for example, and you rip up paper in an attempt to get laughs, she'll just end up hating your guts.
- Don't be too eager to start conversing with her at every possible opportunity. When she walks into the room, you do not have to jump up and say "Hi!!" immediately, but if she sits next to you and initiates conversation, go for it!
Tips
- Try to get her to talk more about her self, and show interest in what she has to say. E.g. you: "what do you do in your free time?" she: "I like to edit on wikiHow." you: "wikiHow!! that's great! how interesting! I just found out about it myself! Isn't it great? Please do tell me more about wikiHow!" Then let her talk while you nod, smile, say "yes" etc.
- No one is out of anyone's reach. It's all about timing, and proper procedure. If you begin a conversation with someone you are interested in with confidence and be yourself, you may be surprised whom you can attract.
- Strange as it may seem, some very pretty girls have never been flirted with or have had a boyfriend because other boys are just as nervous about talking to them as you are. Don't be scared off just because you're intimidated. Sometimes these super popular girls are even lonely because they feel they have all these friends and no one wants to go out with her. So become her friend first and then move on to the flirting (don't stay her friend too long though; she may worry a relationship may ruin a friendship); this way you will not scare her off.
- Flirting is supposed to be fun, so the less stressed and more relaxed you are, the better. Be happy and enjoy the time you spend with a girl, even if nothing else comes of it.
- Remember, no matter what sex you are, girl or boy, if you feel you just can't understand your 'flirtee' because of their gender, relax! Just about everyone feels this way. There's even a book making fun of this titled "Everything Men Know About Women." It's 120 pages long, and every single page, other than the front and back cover, is blank.
- Ask a question like "So how's your boyfriend?", only make it sound more like a casual interest rather than an inquiry to check that she is free. If she says "I don't have one", you're in!
- Be sure to use whatever makes you stand out to your advantage to help get her to notice you. Be funny, charming, a good dresser, etc.
- Be nicely groomed and brush your teeth. Make sure you don't smell bad or wear too much cologne.
- After successfully getting the girl in a position where she will enjoy going on a date with you, ask her out.
- If the girl is very good looking, she may be so used to having guys flirt with her that it won't mean anything. Be cocky and funny. Poke fun at her a little bit and make her laugh. Don't be mean! But, a little sarcasm here and there helps. The girl will feel like you are a challenge that needs to be conquered. Just keep it up and soon you'll have her in your arms.
- A good cologne can make a guy irresistible. Use a little cologne or at least shampoo that smells good. Girls really notice how a guy smells. Just don't wear too much! Too much never smells good! Try stuff Girls love instead of all that car interior stuff, I know if a guy smelled like say strawberries I would love it!
- Keep jumping from one topic to another while talking. Tell her some short wise and wonderful story if there is a long pause in the middle of your conversation.
- Tips from a girl:
- Girls like feeling warm and safe, so if it is cold and she doesn't have a jacket, hug her. Don't give her your jacket right away. Put your arm around her and huddle together, then offer the jacket. Keep hugging, and it might lead to a kiss. Tight but not choking her. If she looks upset, ask her what's wrong. After she tells you what's wrong, hug her. Tightly but again, not choking her. This will make her feel safe.
- When or if you hug her, rub your hand gently up and down on her back. That will make the hug more meaningful.
- I love it when a guy makes eye-contact. Hold it there for 2-4 seconds (long!) and if she looks dazed that means she got lost in your eyes, and is into you. Do this once or twice a day.
- Keep eye contact at all times. If you have pretty eyes, she'll get lost in them, and your chances will shoot up tremendously. Likewise, if you're getting to know someone, and you're asking random questions about her (by the way, that's a good thing), you should try asking her if she can do this -- and demonstrate crossing your eyes. Seriously, when a guy with gorgeous eyes did that to me, it totally completely worked!
- Whenever they tell a joke, even if it's not funny, at least smile. You can tell them you thought it was stupid in a funny tone, but don't flat out tell them it sucked. You'll look like a jerk.
- Make very casual, but meaningful, compliments, even if you're not all that close. These can sometimes be turned into questions. For example, she shows that she can bench more than you can, so you can ask, "Geez, when did you get so strong?" She'll appreciate it, and it may lead to a conversation.
- Girls like feeling warm and safe, so if it is cold and she doesn't have a jacket, hug her. Don't give her your jacket right away. Put your arm around her and huddle together, then offer the jacket. Keep hugging, and it might lead to a kiss. Tight but not choking her. If she looks upset, ask her what's wrong. After she tells you what's wrong, hug her. Tightly but again, not choking her. This will make her feel safe.
- Some girls get confused when you mention something about you liking them, then you take it back, especially if you continue to cycle between these two assertions. Go for the girl! She might like on you on the inside and she's playing hard to get. Never tell anyone else you have a crush on the girl, not even your best friend. Secrets leak out eventually.
- Sit close to her but don't breathe down her neck. Two chairs side-by-side are all that are needed. You might also be able to sit behind her and at times hit her hair a time or two. She'll turn around if she feels you, then make a joke that she finds humorous.
- If you're going to poke her and try to be cute, do it only once or twice. Doing it much more than that will really annoy her, and she will think of you as a pest!
- If you're going to poke her and try to be cute, do it only once or twice. Doing it much more than that will really annoy her, and she will think of you as a pest!
Warnings
- Be prepared for rejection. It happens to everyone at one time or another. The important thing is to not dwell on negative experiences. If you decide to, you might as well be single for the rest of your life.
- If you want to or are trying to flirt with a girl, don't talk about other girls you like when you're in her company, even if not referred to as likable.
- Don't flirt with two girls at once. It will make her confused and stop liking you.
- Don't let her disinterest dissuade you. It doesn't always work at first, just keep speaking to her but don't try any of the techniques. Just learn more about her.
- Don't be TOO cocky. Too cocky is a natural women repellent.
- Do NOT launch into your whole life story the first time you talk with a girl, especially if you are in a fun or casual environment (like a bar or party). It's better to use observational humor or be a little spontaneous. When a girl asks you to tell you about herself give her a short paragraph's worth of info (just moved from blah, I do blah for a living, I just saw this show/this movie/this concert).The shorter the better if there is just a silence keep going. DO NOT tell her about every member of your family, every detail of your uncle Billy's funeral three months ago, and descriptions of your feelings and inner turmoils every day since then. Nobody ACTUALLY wants to know that much about anyone right off the bat.
- The friend zone is a place no man wants to find himself. It's hard to escape from and can totally kill her romantic interest in you. Don't hang out with her constantly unless you're having a romantic relationship. Stay in that little area just below a friend and keep chipping away at her. Someday it might work out but please note that she might only see you as a friend, and not how you see her.
- Don't let her get the wrong idea that you're just an annoying pest.
- If you practice on other girls, don't hurt them. Don't lead them on just to dump them. Pick girls you are really interested in. Who knows, you might end up finding someone even more interesting than the one you have your sights on.
- Don't trust dating advice written by most high school students, unless they are the type of person that can end up hooking up with many varieties of guys or girls very swiftly. Sometimes, even that doesn't work.
- Don't trap her in a corner so you can talk to her; she may find it creepy.
- Never overreact to anything she says. She'll think you're mocking her and will become slightly uneasy.
- Never tell her you like her at the beginning because they might think "woah!" and distance themselves from you.
- Never brag. It's a big turnoff.
- Lastly, don't be stupid. Don't say anything that will make her mad, sad or uncomfortable.
Related wikiHows
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